It’s important for mothers to understand that a newborn’s attachment to them isn’t purely because of breastfeeding or needing food. While breastfeeding as the primary source of nutrition provides numerous physical, psychological, and behavioral benefits, it doesn’t mean the child is dependent on the mother in a way that limits independence. Studies show that babies who are breastfed for at least a year often develop socially acceptable levels of aggression and better interactions with other children, noticeable during preschool and early elementary years.
However, mothers should be aware of separation anxiety syndrome in infants—a common developmental phase that can cause complications if not managed properly. Dr. Mohamed Abu Dawood, a pediatric and neonatology consultant, shared three key strategies to help babies cope with separation anxiety.
What Is Separation Anxiety in Infants?
Separation anxiety typically appears between 6 to 9 months of age, sometimes starting around 10 months. It is characterized by excessive attachment to the mother, with the baby wanting to stay close at all times. Often, infants may nurse continuously—not out of hunger, but for emotional comfort, warmth, and security.
This behavior may be more pronounced if the mother is working and spends long hours away from home, leaving the infant in the care of others. The anxiety reflects early awareness of the mother’s absence, the emptiness it creates, and fear of the external environment. This usually peaks around eight months of age.
Ignoring or mishandling these symptoms can make it harder for the child to develop independence and confidence later. The baby may resist being left alone, cry at any movement of the mother, and the physical burden of carrying a heavier infant over time can cause strain on the mother’s body.
3 Tips to Reduce Separation Anxiety Complications
1. Ask for your baby’s “permission” before leaving:
Babies often sense when the mother is about to leave and may start crying after feeding. Reducing feedings to discourage attachment can backfire, causing rejection of food and persistent crying. Instead, fulfill the child’s emotional needs by talking, playing, and gently reassuring them.
Explain briefly what will happen—e.g., “I’ll leave for a little while and come back soon”—and always return on time. This teaches trust and gradually helps the infant adapt to your temporary absence.
2. Play peek-a-boo to teach object permanence:
Peek-a-boo is a timeless game that helps babies understand that people and objects disappear and reappear. By hiding your face and revealing it shortly after, you create a sense of security and predictability, helping your child gradually get used to short periods of separation.
3. Introduce a trusted substitute caregiver:
Designate someone emotionally close—ideally the father—to share infant care responsibilities. The caregiver can feed, play, and comfort the baby when the mother is away, helping the baby adjust and reducing attachment stress. Avoid using domestic helpers for this role, as they may not provide the same emotional connection.
Keep a small notebook for the substitute caregiver with all important information: temperature records, medications, and daily routines. This ensures consistency and strengthens the child’s bond with both parents, easing the transition during weaning and daily separations.
By applying these strategies, mothers can help infants develop emotional resilience, trust, and a healthy balance between attachment and independence—laying the foundation for confident and self-reliant children.
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