Experts point out that a core part of personal development for young people is self-awareness—the ability to understand oneself, one’s emotions, motivations, and patterns. This awareness doesn’t come from simply reading a book or attending a workshop; it is a lifestyle that develops gradually through reflection and practice.
Self-awareness involves daily behaviors such as courage, patience, observation, questioning, and confronting challenges—skills that can be learned to reach a deeper understanding of oneself.
What Is Self-Awareness?
According to Maryam Bawatneh, a coach and guide in emotional and family healing, self-awareness is:
“Your ability to see yourself from the inside—your feelings, motivations, patterns, and the stories you tell yourself. It’s not just general traits like ‘I’m sensitive’ or ‘I’m impatient,’ but understanding why these traits appear, how they form, and how they unconsciously influence your decisions.”
Indicators of Self-Awareness
Maryam highlights that self-awareness begins when a person moves from description to exploration:
Why do I behave this way?
What is happening inside me before I act?
What am I trying to protect or avoid?
These questions require honesty, curiosity, and freedom from judgment.
Why Young People Sometimes Lack Self-Awareness
Rooted Behaviors and Decisions
Many daily actions are driven by old patterns formed in childhood or unprocessed experiences. These act like internal programs, triggering automatic reactions. Self-aware individuals do not just notice the outcome—they ask:
Where did this come from?
What am I avoiding?
What am I seeking without admitting it?
Relationship with Emotions
How young people relate to their feelings is a key indicator of awareness. Are emotions treated as enemies to suppress, or as messages to understand? For instance, anger often masks pain, fear, helplessness, or crossed boundaries. The self-aware person asks: “What is this anger trying to tell me?”Handling Criticism
Awareness is reflected in how young people respond to feedback:
Do they feel immediately threatened?
Can they pause and reflect before responding?
The self-aware extract lessons from criticism without blindly accepting or rejecting it.
Repeated Patterns in Relationships
Recurring conflicts or repeated wounds with different people reveal unhealed internal issues. Self-awareness means taking responsibility for your inner story rather than blaming others.
Self-Awareness Is Practice, Not Just Knowledge
A common mistake is thinking that reading or attending courses is enough. Knowledge becomes awareness only when tested in:
Moments of emotional reaction
Times of loss
Difficult decisions
“Awareness is measured by what you do when provoked, not by what you say when calm. It’s a lifelong journey—every time you think you’ve arrived, a deeper layer appears requiring attention.”
Practical Steps to Deepen Self-Awareness
Name Your Emotions
When you feel a strong reaction, pause and label it precisely without justification.Ask “Why?” Multiple Times
Ask yourself “Why?” three times to uncover the root motivation behind your behavior.Delay Impulsive Decisions
Give yourself 10 minutes to breathe and observe before reacting.Track Patterns
Record recurring relationships and outcomes; over time, patterns become clear.Seek a Safe Mirror
Ask a trusted person to describe your behavior in specific situations without judgment or flattery.
Conclusion:
Maryam Bawatneh emphasizes:
“Self-awareness is a lifelong commitment—to honesty, humility, and continuous work on yourself. It’s not about polishing your image but freeing yourself from old programs that limit your ability to choose freely.”

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