Building a Strong Child: 3 Phrases to Use & 3 Mistakes to Avoid

Parenting styles have changed over generations. While our parents often used direct orders and strict guidance—which we may have found harsh—they weren’t necessarily wrong. Back then, life was simpler, and respect for elders was deeply ingrained. However, their approach didn’t always leave room for children’s personalities to grow healthily.

Today, with technology shaping our children’s development, we need to be more mindful. Dana Jamil, an educational counselor, highlights 3 short phrases parents can use to strengthen their child’s personality, and 3 mistakes to avoid that can harm it.

3 Phrases That Build a Child’s Character

1. “I trust you”

   • Repeat this phrase often to encourage confidence and independence.

   • Shows your child that it’s safe to try, make mistakes, and keep moving forward.

   • Fathers play an essential role too—support from both parents is crucial in building resilience.

2. “I appreciate your effort”

   • Acknowledge your child’s emotions and actions, even when they make mistakes.

   • Helps them manage anger appropriately and express emotions without harming themselves or others.

3. “I’m proud of you”

   • Praise specific achievements or behaviors, not just general traits.

   • Example: “Your drawing is beautiful; I can see your improvement” encourages skill development more than “You’re a great kid”.

   • Support your child in discovering hobbies, developing talents, and succeeding academically.

3 Mistakes That Can Damage a Child’s Personality

1. Don’t yell at your child in public

   • Criticism or punishment should be reserved for private moments.

   • Losing your temper publicly can harm your child’s confidence and sense of security.

2. Don’t interrupt, no matter how trivial their words seem

   • Listen attentively and allow your child to finish speaking.

   • This reinforces self-worth and the importance of their voice.

3. Don’t appease them when they cry or make a mistake

   • Avoid giving in to crying or tantrums to “calm them down.”

   • Teaching accountability and consequences early prevents manipulative behaviors in the future.

Key Takeaways

• Using positive phrases consistently nurtures confidence, resilience, and emotional intelligence.

• Avoiding common mistakes protects the child’s sense of self and strengthens character.

• Goal: Raise a self-aware, confident child capable of handling emotions, making decisions, and expressing themselves authentically.