Why Do Children Cry Around Strangers and How to Handle It

Many mothers notice that their children cry in the presence of strangers. For example, a child may start crying when guests arrive at home, or when going to a public place such as a park, shopping center, or a friend’s gathering. The child may scream in a restaurant or play area, kick objects with their feet, throw themselves on the floor, and raise their voice to get attention.

Crying in the presence of strangers or in noisy environments is a common issue that parents want to address. To understand how to handle it, Nadormagazinespoke with child development and parenting expert Aref Abdullah, who shared important tips for managing a child’s tantrums in public.

Is Crying Around Strangers Normal?

It’s important to know that crying when seeing guests or going to public places is a normal behavior for children around 1.5 to 3 years old. This includes lying on the floor, kicking, hitting with hands, or removing shoes.

At this age, the child only knows their mother and is still learning to navigate social situations. However, if this behavior appears after age three, it may indicate other underlying issues that require attention.

Tips for Managing Crying Around Strangers

1. Don’t Give In to Threats

When a child cries in front of guests or in public, it’s often because they want to get something they are normally denied. For example, they may demand an iPad or insist on buying expensive toys. Giving in reinforces this behavior and encourages them to repeat it in the future.

2. Don’t Yell at Your Child

Yelling or threatening your child (like sending them to their room or to a grandparent) usually increases the intensity of the tantrum instead of stopping it.

3. Stay Calm and Breathe

Whether your child cries in the car, restaurant, or playground, remain calm. Take deep breaths and recognize that your child is expressing negative emotions—not trying to embarrass you.

4. Offer Comfort

For children under four, hugging or holding them gently can help calm a tantrum. Ask what’s bothering them—maybe a tight shoe lace, uncomfortable belt, or hard chair—and acknowledge their feelings.

5. Get Down to Their Level

Stand down on your knees or squat so you’re at eye level with your child. Gently pat their shoulder and speak softly:

"Come, let’s talk in private."

You can guide them from the guest room to their room or even a restroom in public.

6. Ignore Resistance (With Caution)

If the child refuses to stop crying after comfort and redirection, ignore the tantrum briefly. Walk slowly and allow them to process, making sure you stay close for safety. Often, they will stop crying to follow you.

7. Praise Calm Behavior

When the child stops crying, even for a few moments, praise them warmly: pat their hair, smile, or draw attention from family members to their good behavior.

For children over four, use these moments to encourage self-control. Offer a small reward, or redirect them to play or an activity instead of giving in to unnecessary demands.

Example: If your child calms down in the house, say happily:

"Let’s go together to prepare juice or snacks for the guests."

This reinforces patience, cooperation, and appropriate social behavior.

Key Takeaways

• Crying around strangers is normal for toddlers, especially under three.

• Stay calm, don’t yell, and offer comfort.

• Get down to the child’s level and redirect gently.

• Ignore manipulative behavior safely and reinforce calm moments.

• Use these moments to teach responsibility, patience, and social skills.

With consistency, your child will learn to manage emotions and interact appropriately with strangers and public settings.