In the journey of life, the paths are often filled with obstacles, and hearts are not immune to moments of despair. We plan, dream, and strive, only to collide with the unforgiving wall of reality, and find ourselves feeling frustrated, burdened, and disturbed. Frustration is not a sign of weakness; rather, it is a natural reaction when the distance between what we desire and what we have becomes too wide, between our dreams and our current reality.
But does this mean we should give up? Should we allow ourselves to be prisoners of despair? Of course not. Just as the night, no matter how long, cannot prevent the sunrise, frustration, no matter how intense, cannot extinguish the light of hope within us—so long as we have the will and the desire for change.
Frustration is a natural emotional response when we fail to achieve a goal or desire. It often comes with anxiety, tension, or even a loss of hope. Everyone experiences it at some point, but surrendering to it can have negative consequences on both mental and physical health.
As Jon Hajar, a Master’s degree holder in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), shares, frustration is that heavy feeling that creeps upon us quietly when things don't go as we hope, or when we face stagnation after a long effort. "No one is immune from it, no matter how strong or successful they may appear. But the beauty of the human spirit is its ability to heal, recover, and rise again."
How Can We Deal with Frustration?
Rather than seeing frustration as a problem, it can be viewed as a gentle internal signal telling us that something requires our attention. Here are effective ways to deal with frustration, as suggested by experts like Jon Hajar:
1. Acknowledge Your Emotions: Don’t Ignore Them
Frustration is not a sign of weakness but a reflection of unmet needs or unfulfilled expectations. Ignoring it or suppressing it can allow it to grow stronger internally.
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Action: Be honest with yourself: "Yes, I am frustrated. This does not diminish my strength."
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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) teaches that labeling your emotions brings them to light, helping you take the first step toward releasing them.
2. Remind Yourself: This Feeling Is Temporary
When frustrated, our minds tend to engage in catastrophic thinking, believing that our feelings will last forever. But emotions are like waves—they rise and then recede.
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Action: Keep reminding yourself, "This feeling will pass, just like many others before it."
3. Tune Out the Noise and Connect with Yourself
Sometimes, frustration comes not from within but from external pressures: comparisons, expectations, societal pressures.
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Action: Practice mindfulness. Take a moment, breathe deeply, and ask yourself, "What do I need, not what others expect of me?"
4. Avoid Isolation—Reach Out to Those Who Understand You
Frustration often loves isolation, but isolation only prolongs it. You don’t need to explain everything, but a word from someone who understands can help you a lot.
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Action: Look for your safe circles: friends, therapists, or even a personal journal.
5. Turn Frustration into Motivation
This may seem challenging when you're deeply immersed in frustration, but some of the greatest transformations in life have started with frustration.
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Action: Ask yourself, "What can I learn from this situation? What can I do differently?"
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This shift from a victim mentality to a growth mindset is one of the most powerful tools in positive psychology.
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6. Take Care of Your Body—Mind and Body Are One
Adequate sleep, daily movement, and a balanced diet are not luxuries—they are essentials. Neglecting your body increases frustration, and vice versa.
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Action: Pay attention to your physical well-being, as it directly impacts your mental state.
Effective Strategies to Overcome Frustration (According to Jon Hajar)
Express Your Feelings
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Don’t bottle up your emotions. Talk about them with someone you trust.
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Journaling or daily writing can help release negative emotions.
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Reevaluate the Situation
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Ask yourself: "Is the problem really as big as I think?"
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Try to view things from a different perspective—there might be opportunities within the challenges.
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Set Realistic Goals
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Break down big goals into smaller, achievable steps.
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Celebrate every small achievement, as each one is a step toward success.
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Exercise Regularly
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Physical activity stimulates the release of endorphins, the body's natural "happiness hormones."
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Even a 20-minute walk every day can make a significant difference.
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Pay Attention to Sleep and Nutrition
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Poor sleep and bad eating habits can increase stress and frustration.
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Aim for a balanced diet and ensure you get enough rest.
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Avoid Sources of Stress
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Limit interactions with negative people or situations.
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Set aside time for relaxation and activities you enjoy.
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Practice Mindfulness and Meditation
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Breathing exercises and meditation help calm the mind.
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Try meditation apps or listen to soothing music to center yourself.
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Seek Professional Help
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If frustration persists for a prolonged period, don’t hesitate to consult a mental health professional.
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Therapy can be a valuable tool for self-understanding and overcoming challenges.
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Final Thoughts from Jon Hajar:
Frustration does not mean you are on the wrong path; sometimes, it’s just a short break to help you realign your steps. Be kind to yourself, and remember: You are not alone, and no feeling, no matter how intense, lasts forever—it always carries within it the seed of healing.
By adopting these strategies, we can shift from a state of frustration to one of personal growth and resilience. Embrace frustration as a signal to reflect, learn, and move forward stronger than before.
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