If the mother bears the responsibility of caring for the child from birth—breastfeeding, nursing, and cleaning the child until they can manage on their own—then around the age of two, the child begins eating solid food and using the bathroom independently. At this point, they take their first steps toward becoming an independent personality, ready to face life. This is when the mother's role shifts to establishing educational foundations that help her manage the child and assist the child in interacting and communicating with society.
There are several essential educational principles that a mother must follow if she wants to raise a well-rounded person rather than a damaged one. "nadormagazine" interviewed educational counselor Aref Abdullah, who highlighted some key parenting guidelines to help mothers deal with their children from an early age, including allowing them to cry and respecting their privacy. These include:
1. Let Your Child Cry to Express Emotions
Let your child cry to express their feelings. After the age of two, children cry for psychological reasons—not just hunger, colic, or teething pain like when they were infants. Allowing them to cry helps you understand their emotional needs. Never yell at or punish a child for crying, no matter how irritating it seems.
Calmly ignore persistent crying at first, allowing your child to vent. Eventually, the crying will subside, and you can talk to them peacefully. Do not shout things like, “You’re a man, and men don’t cry,” and never resort to physical punishment. The damage caused by hitting or yelling far outweighs the discomfort of crying.
2. Set Firm Rules Before Leaving the House
Discuss clear rules with your child before going out—such as behavior expectations when visiting friends or shopping. This prevents embarrassment or conflict in public if your child makes demands or throws tantrums. Set guidelines, like how much money will be spent or what will be purchased, and promise a small reward for good behavior.
3. Ban Screen Time Until Age Two
4. Don’t Use the Father as a Threat
Stop using the father as a source of fear—“I’ll tell your dad when he gets home.” This weakens the child’s bond with the father, who should be a symbol of love, safety, and trust. It also reflects a lack of authority on the mother’s part and can explain why children may behave better for their fathers than for their mothers.
5. Teach the Concept of Winning and Losing
Explain to your child that life involves both success and failure. One of the best ways to do this is through group play. Playing with others helps your child understand the concept of winning and losing and gradually nurtures healthy competitiveness. This reduces selfishness and helps them adapt socially.
6. Teach and Respect Privacy
Start teaching your child about privacy before the age of two. Don’t change diapers in front of others. Bathe and dress them in private to help them understand bodily boundaries. This lays the foundation for protecting themselves from abuse in the future. Also, teach them to respect others’ privacy—like knocking before entering a room or not peeking through doors.
7. Protect Your Child’s Dignity
8. Don’t Punish or Scold in Public
Avoid punishing or criticizing your child in front of others. This damages their self-esteem and can lead to rebellious behavior. Discipline should be private and age-appropriate. Speak to your child calmly and in a quiet place away from others. Public humiliation can make them act out even more.
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